Effortless Expansion Episode #005: The #1 Thing Holding Women Back

podcast Sep 01, 2022

I see this in my coaching containers, as I am scrolling on social media, and this is even something I have struggled with in the past. It’s this belief that we can’t have our desires.

There, I said it. We’ve all experienced it.

We see Sally down the street with a brand new car, or a gorgeous body, or the perfect husband and we immediately think, “I can’t have that.”

There are many reasons why we may feel this way:

  • There isn’t enough to go around
  • Our history prevents us from having x, y, or z
  • We don’t have what it takes
  • We aren’t willing to put in that level of work

Whatever excuse you find yourself using, it is all an illusion of this “there-isn’t-enough-pie-in-the-sky-mentality.”

I’m here to tell you that this isn’t true.

Just because she has it, you can have it, too.

There are enough new cars, lovely husbands, and banging bodies to go around. Seriously, there isn’t a shortage of goodness and no amount of anyone else having it takes away from the possibility of you also having it.

You know I am REALLY into desires. I believe with my entire heart that you get to have what you want. Your desires were placed into your heart for a reason and they are literally destined for you.

Let me say it more clearly, you were born worthy of your desires and nothing has changed. You’ve just now become aware of them by  scrolling on Instagram and seeing somebody driving that car you want, or someone vacationing at the place you'd really like to go, or somebody with an incredible marriage. 

Here’s the best part– you don’t need to mentally tear that person down for having what you want. You don’t have to shame and guilt yourself because you want it and you definitely don’t have to put blinders on to ignore anyone that triggers you.

Begin to see these “triggers” as a sign or insight to your true desire. This is the universe talking to you.

When you see something that gives you that ping of jealousy or envy, see it for what it truly is– DESIRE. It’s like the Universe saying, “Hey, Jess, this is possible for you, too!”

Notice how you feel when you look at something that you don’t want… nothing, right? It’s neutral and likely doesn’t come with a story.

Notice how you feel when you look at something you do want and also notice your thoughts. You’ll quickly realize that the discomfort you feel is you holding the belief that you can’t have what you want.

Just let go of that belief.

What would happen, if you just let yourself believe you could have it? I’m not suggesting you go shout it from the rooftop but, what if, in the privacy of your own mind, you let yourself believe you could? You probably spend more mental energy telling yourself why you can’t have it, so what could this hurt?

I’ll tell you one thing for sure, belief is powerful. It’s the most powerful tool you can leverage right now, in this moment. I know it’s not easy to change your mind but I do know it’s possible, I am living proof. My life is a testimony to the power of belief and I am committed to show you the way. To inspire and expand you, one mindset shift at a time.

If you’re ready to do life differently, I would like to invite you into my newest program, Unruly. This is for the woman who examines every area of her life, her bank account, relationships, sex life, how she parents, how she show up for herself, and how she treats herself. If something isn’t working, she changes things up. She is committed to taking massive action and co-creates her dream life with the universe. She gets what she wants and writes her own rules.

I’m sure by now you’re nodding your head to all of this, so I will just go ahead and leave the link here.



We hate SPAM. We will never sell your information, for any reason.