The Mom Movement Episode #039: 3 Signs It’s Time For A Mama Mindset Makeover
Did you know that your mindset might be hurting you rather than helping you? This is because your mindset is key to manifesting your dreams and accomplishing your goals. If your mindset is working against you, it might be time for a Mama mindset makeover.
So a mindset makeover is exactly what it sounds like: A mom (you) taking over or redoing your mindset. And as mom, it's easy to get into bad habits that kill our mindset. It might be letting the little things get to us, falling out of our mom power or maybe it's skipping self care because we're feeling mom guilt. You know how it goes, we don't want to leave our kids, we don't wanna miss out, get a babysitter or ask our husband.
These are your signs it’s time for a Mama mindset makeover:
- You find yourself overwhelmed and frustrated frequently even when you don’t know why
- You experience resentment or bitterness
- You’re raising your children the way you were raised even though it’s not working for your family
- You’re struggling to find and stay in your mom power
- You don’t consider yourself a person anymore
Let’s dive into each of these a bit deeper, shall we?
You find yourself overwhelmed and frustrated frequently even when you don’t know why
So listen, you're gonna have moments as a Mom that are gonna drive you insane. It just is what it is. Right? It's normal. It's expected. We're human. We came here for a human experience. It's when you're finding yourself becoming overwhelmed and frustrated so much that you're likely losing yourself or control over your emotions. You know, screaming at your kids, saying things that you didn't mean and, or reacting instead of responding to things in your external environment. How can you see these things as happening for you instead of happening to you? This is a big sign that you need a mindset makeover.
You experience resentment or bitterness
Frustration, resentment and bitterness all stem from unmet needs. I invite you to ponder what are your unmet needs between you, your child, yourself, and in your relationships?
When you can identify what those unmet needs are, you can realign your life to be able to meet those needs for yourself.
Here's the cold hard truth… you are the only one that's gonna take care of you.
You're the only one in the whole world that will do it. As much as your children love you, as much as your spouse may love you, as much as your family may love you, you have to look out for you.
You’re raising your children the way you were raised even though it’s not working for your family
Oftentimes we get caught up on this is how things “should” be. I want invite you to consider, is this is how you were taught to be or is this what works for you? It doesn’t matter what your mom or grandmother did because here's the thing, if it doesn’t work for your family it doesn’t work for your family. No justification needed. I really stand by that and embody a life that looks unconventional for other people. The way I raise my children is way different than my mom and my grandmother raised me and way different than society in a lot of ways. For the record, I tried to do things like society says, like I was taught and it didn't work for my family. It left me burnout with no self confidence. It left me desiring more and it left me in a marriage that had zero passion.
When I released this expectation to “follow the rules” and did what worked for me and my family, everything changed. We're thriving now. We are so incredibly healthy, wealthy and so freaking happy. This has been a huge part of my evolution in my mindset, in personal growth, in manifestation, and in starting this new career in coaching and mentoring. I'm so grateful for this journey and I'm here to support you where you need it.
You’re struggling to find and stay in your mom power
Your mom power is your personal power. Meaning, no matter what happens outside of you, you can stay calm, cool, collected, despite breaking up a fight with your kids. Despite having to load your groceries in the rain. Despite all of the things. When you allow external circumstances to derail you from feeling good, aligned, happy or confident about yourself you become a victim of the circumstance.
This is why I talk so much about staying in your Mom power. This is your personal power that no matter what happens around you, you can feel all the feelings of disappointment, anger or whatever AND stay in your personal power instead of blowing a gasket.
You may think okay, I can do this. But then your kids break a family heirloom and it's gone before your eyes and you see red. It happens, but it doesn't have to. The work is in retraining, rewiring, and reframing your brain to stay in your power.
So the mindset makeover is all about identifying and amplifying your Mom power. This means learning how to recognize when you're feeling incredible and staying there. Here are a few ways to drop into your power:
- taking a bath
- having sex
- getting your nails done
- reading a good book
- buying a pair of jeans that fit just right
You know the feeling when you're tapped in, tuned, in, and turned on. But can you stay there when life gets messy? Can you feel all the feelings but yet stay in your power?
You don't consider yourself a person anymore
This is a big one. When you're making decisions, what is your thought process? Mine used to be centered around what would or could it do for my family? I always thought about what they needed, wanted, or dreamed of first before I considered my own needs and desires. While that's an okay way to live it, it's not for me. And frankly, I am of the belief that it will send you into Mom burnout really freaking quick.
So while you want what's best for your family, you also have to remember that you two are part of that said family, and that your decision should, should also impact you. You're allowed to make decisions that benefit you too. I'm a big proponent of “me first, my energy first”, before I can serve my family. I’ve said this a million times but I will say it again, when you thrive, your family thrives.
I want to invite you into my world and if you’re feeling called for more, please don’t hesitate to reach out @effortlesslyjess!